There are more ways to communicate with family members than ever. There are smartphones, texts, emails, voicemails, social media, and more. In spite of these vehicles and platforms, many families still have difficulty when it comes to discussing death.
Intellectually, we may understand the importance of talking about death, but it is also seemingly simpler to avoid the conversation.
If the thought of discussing death with your family makes you, or them, a bit uncomfortable, here are some tips that can help.
Make Sure You Are Prepared
Know what it is that you want to cover in your discussion. Write down key points regarding medical care, finances, and wishes for final services. While you may know what you want, be open and receptive to their desires and needs.
Arrange a Gathering of the Family
It is critical to gather close family members at a suitable time and place that is comfortable. Let them know that their attendance and input are important to you. Your goal is to create an atmosphere of a clear and shared understanding.
Be Sensitive
Avoid blunt language and absolutes. Let family members know that you have given the topic careful consideration and have researched the subjects involved. You do not want to come across as inflexible or demanding. Let them know you are sensitive to their needs, but most of the decisions are yours. To be as effective as possible, conduct the meeting as a discussion, not a presentation.
Express Your Desires
While this is a discussion, it is also the time and place to express your wishes. You may be able to use the recent death of a friend or relative as an example of what prompted the discussion. Share your preferences and explain your reasoning.
Cover topics like finances, your will, trusts, cremation or traditional burial, and final resting place.
Choose Representatives
It can be important to identify a medical care proxy and power of attorney should you be unable to make medical decisions on your own. Identify the executor of your will and estate.
Share the location and details of important information and documents like your will, life insurance, military papers, and other important items. Of course, you will want to arrange for the care of any minor children.
Use the Meeting as a Starting Point
The meeting can even be used as a starting point for those in attendance to begin the thought process of their own end-of-life decisions.
Keep Family Members Informed
Now that the discussion has begun, keep family members informed of any potential changes in your plans. This can be particularly important if future events like a marriage or death may change circumstances. Once the topic has been approached, families often find it easier and more comfortable to approach the subject in the future.
The Role of a Funeral Director
A funeral director can be a valuable partner in preplanning for final services and the options available. At Fares J. Radel Funeral Homes and Crematory, we would be proud to serve as a resource for your family. We are here to answer your questions and assist with your plans. We can even come to your home or office to discuss your wishes.
If you live in the Greater Cincinnati or Northern Kentucky area and have yet to select a trusted provider for funeral services, we would be honored to serve you. Reach out to us at Fares J. Radel.
From deeply religious services to celebrations of life and cremations, our caring team has the experience and compassion to meet your needs and desires. Please feel free to contact us when pre-planning or in a time of need.
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